请问能帮我看看这篇作文吗?文章有没有语法或用词错误,或者不合适观点,题目是家庭关系不再像以前那样亲

请问能帮我看看这篇作文吗?文章有没有语法或用词错误,或者不合适观点,题目是家庭关系不再像以前那样亲
Living in modern society ,it has a prevalent phenomenon that people all have a feeling ,which is becoming alienation among family members.On the one hand some people suppose this problem is due to high-tech products ,on the other hand some think the high pace society should be responsible for this issue.
Individual ,who lives such modern society ,is impossible to survival without high-tech products.For instance ,people are used to send messages by e-mail,which was by letter,although it becomes more convenient than before ,it lacks real feeling and emotions.And in terms of communication,public have used to use cell phone rather than sit toghter and talking face to face.It is obviously that we spend much more time on machine than with families.And due to this reason ,we are pushed fulfill stuff effectively and alienation.
Despite above reason ,a undeniable fact is the living environment develops larger and larger ,the distance is becoming a dominating obstacle which makes inconvenient to go parents' home or visit relatives for young workers.In particular the youngest who works or studies far away from home,even in another cities or counties,in anther words,is seldom visit parents .It is no denied that would makes relation between different generation less closer.
Last but not least ,as we know that there exists relation gap between different generation.Nevertheless less talking opportunities and less time spent with families increase wide of gap.As a conclusion,a effectively approach for trickle this issue is encourage people take more communities ,specially between parents and son or daughter,in addition ,using high-tech products have more video chatting with relatives.and if it is possible that we should spend more time stay with the elder .

（1）Living in modern society ,it has a prevalent phenomenon that people all have a feeling ,which is becoming alienation among family members.
Living in modern society用的是非谓语动词,那他得有自己的逻辑主语,谁生活在当今社会?是我们,所以句子应该改为Living in modern society ,we find there is a prevalent phenomenon
（2） this problem is due to high-tech products
due to是动词,前面不应该有系动词is,要去掉
（3）who lives such modern society
在哪居住,live是个不及物动词,得加上介词in后才能跟宾语
（4）rather than sit toghter and talking face to face
and连接的两个并列词时态应该是一致的,rather than后用动词原形,所以talking改为talk
（5）It is obviously that we spend much more time on machine than with families
is系动词后应跟形容词,obviously改为obvious；spend some time on sth,或spend some time in doing sth,families是名词,所以用介词on,后面的with families改为on families
（6）Despite above reason
上面列举了多于一个的原因,所以应用复数reasons
（7）in anther words
换句话说应该是in other words
（8）It is no denied that would makes relation between different generation less closer.
想说的是难怪代与代之间的关系不像以前那么近了.“难怪”：It is no wonder that或No wonder；would makes去掉,从句变为relation between different generation become less closer,一个主系表结构
（9）less time spent with families
spent with families 做的是time的后置定语,spend和time是主动关系,应用spending with families
（10）a effectively approach for trickle this issue is encourage people take more communities ,
effectively 是以元音音素开头的副词,冠词应用an,其修饰的是名词approach,所以应用形容词effective；
approach to （doing）sth,改为an effective approach to trickling this issue ；
is encourage people take more communities ,是为了鼓励人们做某事,不定式表目的,改为is to encourage,鼓励某人做某事应为encourage people to do sth,改为is to encourage people to take more communities
（11）using high-tech products have more video chatting with relatives
using和have与前面的encourage是并列的,所以都应用同一时态,改为use high-tech products ,and have more video chatting with relatives
（12）and if it is possible that we should spend more time stay with the elder .
这是个条件状语从句,“如果可能的话”,“if It is possible,”或“if possible,” ,状语从句英语主句用逗号隔开,改为if It is possible,we should spend --；spend some time on sth,或spend some time in doing sth,stay是动词,所以改为staying,整个句子应为if It is possible,we should spend more time staying with the elde